Pada saat hendak menulis bagian, hati gw sakit banget, ud.. Kalau lu pernah membaca kata-kata di dalam puisi yang isinya adalah tentang :”hati gw tersayat, hati gw teriris, dll...”, itulah hal yang gw rasakan saat ini. Mau menangis tapi tak bisa, mau melupakan tapi tak sanggup, mau membencimu juga tak mungkin, mau mencintaimu juga bukan opsi, mau menganggapmu sebagai teman, pastinya sangat sulit bagiku bersamamu, tapi kutau hatimu sudah bukan milikku.. Apa yang harus kulakukan?
Tell me.....
Selama masa-masa pacaran itu, gw bener-bener berharap dari dalam hati gw, kalau kita bisa kek gitu terus. Tiba saatnya gw harus pergi ke luar kota, karena urusan pekerjaan, perginya tak tanggung-tanggung lagi, harus 6 bulan minimal, dan sebulan kita hanya bisa ketemu sekali... Tahukah dirimu? Begitu berat rasanya hatiku untuk meniggalkan mu... Ingatkah kau air mata yang muncul pada saat hendak berpisah denganmu? Itu bukan sekedar air mata “keberatan hati”, ada di dalamnya rasa sayang, rasa kawatir, rasa takut kehilangan, cinta dan harapan...
Gw masih ingat tanggalnya, tanggal 14 Juni 2010, terakhir kita bertemu seminggu sebelum kita berpisah. Di malam itu, gw masih ingat, dan gw telah berjanji padamu, wajahmu di malam itu, sebelum lu melepas gw pergi, akan gw ingat selamanya di dalam hati gw. Ya, gw masih ingat, hingga malam ini, pakaian yang kau pakai, pandangan matamu, air matamu, semuanya...tak akan pernah kulupa.
Tahukah dirimu? Di saat itu, satu hal yang membuat diriku tenang, adalah janji mu untuk menungguku hingga ku kembali. Ku tahu kalau kau bukan orang yang sembarangan umbar janji, makanya gw tenang di dalam janjimu...
Lu pergi ke kota Malang pada saat itu, kau memang bilang kalau kau gak ingin pergi, tapi, ud...gak mungkin gw mengiyakan usul mu, gw rela mengorbankan perasaan gw, biarlah gw sendiri aja yang merindumu di sini, tapi kau have fun di sana....
Minggunya, tgl 20 Juni 2010, tak bisa bertemu denganmu, karena kau ada di malang, gw ada di jakarta. Hari itu, kita hanya berhubungan lewat telepon, lu sempat komplain tentang ponakan yang sakit dan rewel. Lu juga pernah bercerita tentang taman hiburan di Malang, dan lu membeli kacamata :)
Senin, 29 November 2010
What my heart wants to say..
Ud, gak sanggup ku menahan rasa di hati ini...
Gw ingin bilang ke lu :”gw sayang lu, ud..., gak bisa segampang itu gw melupakan dirimu ud, seperti katamu...gw sayang padamu, lebih dari cinta...jgn paksa gw melupakan dirimu”
Gw tau, gw harus melupakan, tapi gw benar-benar gak sanggup, ud. seandainya saja gw bisa melupakan dirimu, maka tulisan ini tak akan pernah dibuat...
Gw ingin bilang ke lu banyak hal, tapi gw gak bisa, taukah dirimu betapa sakit dan susahnya menahan rasa sayang di hati? Jika kau tahu gimana rasa sakitnya menahan rasa suka kepada seseorang yang tak kesampaian, coba bayangkan dan pahami perasaan hatiku ini, betapa sakitnya dan tak sanggupnya gw untuk menahan rasa sayang gw ke lu...
Gw gk bisa bilang ke lu, karena gw takut...gw takut kalau nantinya yang ada hanyalah diam yang kau berikan, gw gak mau kalau harapan gw terbunuh lagi...gw gak sanggup, ud...
Hati gw hancur sekarang, gw memang masih masuk kantor seperti biasanya, nonton ke bioskop setiap hanya sekedar untuk melupakanmu. Tapi, tak bisa, bahkan selagi di dalam bioskop pun, hanya kau yang ada di benak gw....
Gw tau, gw gak mungkin bisa mengatakan hal ini secara langsung padamu...setidaknya tidak sekarang...maka kuputuskan untuk kutulis di sini saja, dengan harapan, suatu saat nanti, kau akan dapat mengetahui semua isi hatiku...
Gw ingin bilang ke lu :”gw sayang lu, ud..., gak bisa segampang itu gw melupakan dirimu ud, seperti katamu...gw sayang padamu, lebih dari cinta...jgn paksa gw melupakan dirimu”
Gw tau, gw harus melupakan, tapi gw benar-benar gak sanggup, ud. seandainya saja gw bisa melupakan dirimu, maka tulisan ini tak akan pernah dibuat...
Gw ingin bilang ke lu banyak hal, tapi gw gak bisa, taukah dirimu betapa sakit dan susahnya menahan rasa sayang di hati? Jika kau tahu gimana rasa sakitnya menahan rasa suka kepada seseorang yang tak kesampaian, coba bayangkan dan pahami perasaan hatiku ini, betapa sakitnya dan tak sanggupnya gw untuk menahan rasa sayang gw ke lu...
Gw gk bisa bilang ke lu, karena gw takut...gw takut kalau nantinya yang ada hanyalah diam yang kau berikan, gw gak mau kalau harapan gw terbunuh lagi...gw gak sanggup, ud...
Hati gw hancur sekarang, gw memang masih masuk kantor seperti biasanya, nonton ke bioskop setiap hanya sekedar untuk melupakanmu. Tapi, tak bisa, bahkan selagi di dalam bioskop pun, hanya kau yang ada di benak gw....
Gw tau, gw gak mungkin bisa mengatakan hal ini secara langsung padamu...setidaknya tidak sekarang...maka kuputuskan untuk kutulis di sini saja, dengan harapan, suatu saat nanti, kau akan dapat mengetahui semua isi hatiku...
Minggu, 28 November 2010
S.H.M.I.L.Y (2)
Masih ingat percakapan kita yang ini?
G: “Lu tau kan gw masih sayang sama lu?”
U: “iya”
G: “Tau dari mana?”
U: “Lu yang bilang”
G: “tau gak sedalam apa?”
U: “enggak, emank bisa diukur?”
Gw terdiam, memikirkan jawaban yang tak bisa kudapatkan.
G: “iya juga sih, hehe”
Sekarang ku tahu jawabnya.
I will tell you now.
Gw sayang sama lu, ud.. saking sayangnya, tak bisa ku melalui setiap hari tanpa berpikir tentang dirimu, apakah dirimu sudah makan / di luar / sudah pulang / kedinginan / sudah sembuh blm?
Begitu sayangnya diri gw padamu, sampai ku rela menjadi tempat lu mengadu, ku rela menjagamu seumur hidup gw, ku rela menemani mu di saat suka dan duka, tak akan pernah ku meninggalkanmu
Sedalam itulah cintaku padamu...
G: “Lu tau kan gw masih sayang sama lu?”
U: “iya”
G: “Tau dari mana?”
U: “Lu yang bilang”
G: “tau gak sedalam apa?”
U: “enggak, emank bisa diukur?”
Gw terdiam, memikirkan jawaban yang tak bisa kudapatkan.
G: “iya juga sih, hehe”
Sekarang ku tahu jawabnya.
I will tell you now.
Gw sayang sama lu, ud.. saking sayangnya, tak bisa ku melalui setiap hari tanpa berpikir tentang dirimu, apakah dirimu sudah makan / di luar / sudah pulang / kedinginan / sudah sembuh blm?
Begitu sayangnya diri gw padamu, sampai ku rela menjadi tempat lu mengadu, ku rela menjagamu seumur hidup gw, ku rela menemani mu di saat suka dan duka, tak akan pernah ku meninggalkanmu
Sedalam itulah cintaku padamu...
Our Story - Part IV - The Dating
The Dating
Minggu setelahnya, kita berjanji untuk bertemu di CL, tapi karena buswaynya bermasalah, kita mengganti tempat bertemu di TA. Hari itu, kau memakai baju “baby milo yang coklat tua itu, dengan jaket bergaris2 coklat putih”. Ya, image dirimu selalu gw simpan, tak peduli apapun yang kau pakai.
Itulah malam pertama kita makan bersama. Sushi Groove, semeja berdua. Gw yang selama ini tak suka wasabi, kau tunjukkan cara makan yang benar, dan sejak saat itu, ku jadi menyukai wasabi. Saat itu, kubertanya, gimana caranya biar gw bisa memeluk dan mencium mu lagi, dan kau menyarankan untuk ke tempat mu saja.
Hari pertama gw ke tempat mu, sangat canggung sekali, untuk bertemu dengan bokap dan nyokap lu, rasanya gw canggung sekali, tapi dirimu selalu ada untuk ku.. Dan sejak saat itu, kita selalu menghabiskan weekend berdua, selama 2 hari 2 malam. Jumat malam, Sabtu pagi dan malam, dan minggu pagi.
Tahukah dirimu, setiap kali akan berpisah dengan dirimu, pelukan dan ciuman darimu tak pernah cukup kurasa? Begitu tak ingin ku meninggalkanmu, makanya gw bersikeras untuk bertahan sampai malam. Tak tega ku memintamu untuk mengantar gw pulang, karena tempat tinggal kita yang berjauhan. I love you too much to see you get hurt.
(lagi2, air mataku harus menetes ketika menuliskan bagian ini)
You know me, right? Gw sangat sayang dan protektif *tapi bukan posesif* ke orang yang gw sayang. Mana mungkin gw tega memintamu mengantar kan dirimu, setelah itu pulang sendiri lagi di malam hari? Mana mungkin ku tega kau kedinginan oleh karena angin malam >.<
Ku terlalu mencintaimu untuk memintamu melakukan hal itu...
Itulah alasannya kenapa gw kadang suka marah dan kesel sendiri kalau lu lagi keluar, setelah itu kau tetap mengantar kan teman mu pulang dulu, baru lah kau sendiri pulang. Tak tega ku melihatmu jika kau sakit, tapi tak pernah kukatakan padamu, karena, kutau, tak mungkin lah aku ada di tengah antara kau dan temanmu.
Hari - hari kita, kita lalui dengan manis dan indah. Kadang di dapur, ketika kau mengambilkan nasi, kupeluk dirimu dari belakang. Pada saat ku mencuci piring, kau membalas memeluk ku dari belakang...
Masih ingatkah dirimu bagaimana kita makan takoyaki? Kerupuk atau bahkan 1 oreo dimakan berdua?
Haha, iya, saling nyuapin :)Kenangan-kenangan itu akan selalu kusimpan di dalam hatiku
Maafkan diriku ketika sedang bersamamu di luar, maafkan diriku yang tak mungkin bisa mempertontonkan rasa sayangku padamu di depan umum. Maafkan diriku yang tak pernah punya keberanian itu. Kini, kusadar begitu banyak kesalahan yang kulakukan...
Ku masih ingat, saat kutanya dirimu..
G: “Sayang gw gak?”
U: “Ya iyalah, dodol ah”
Di kesempatan lain
G: “lu sayang gw gak?”
U: “banget”
Di kesempatan lain lagi
G: “ i love you, honey”
U: “i love you, too”
Di kesempatan yang lain lagi
G: “Lu cinta sama gw gak?”
U: “Enggak”
G: “Lho? Jadi gitu? Selingkuh neh?”
U: “ Tega? Oh mau? Ya uda, sana sanaa”
G: “Gw gak bilang gw mau”
U: “Terus ngapain nanya?”
G: “jadi cinta gak?”
U: “iya, sayang”
G: “emank bedanya cinta sama sayang itu apa?
U: “ Cinta itu gampang dilupakan, sayang itu susah”
Tahukah dirimu, betapa kau membuatku menjadi pria yang paling bahagia di saat itu, bisa mendengarkan kalimat seperti itu dari dirimu, yang sifat dasarnya adalah cuek. Saat itu, ku tahu bahwa kau benar-benar sayang padaku, dan saat itu juga, sudah kuputuskan, ku akan mencintaimu selamanya...
Tahukah dirimu, ketika dirimu batuk selama beberapa bulan, mendengar dirimu dikerok, betapa sakit nya hatiku, ku menangis di hati (kubayangkan betapa sakitnya itu), tahukah dirimu ketika kau mengatakan bahwa semua sendi-sendimu itu sakit, ku menelepon nyokap gw untuk tau obatnya?
Tahukah dirimu, ku sangat mencintaimu...mungkin lebih dari apapun di dunia ini...
Hon, let’s try again, give us another chance, take my hand, fall in love with me again...
Izinkahlah diriku memeluk mesra dirimu setiap malam kita bersama, izinkanlah diriku memperhatikan dirimu saat kau tidur, dan izinkanlah diriku membisikkan “I love you, dan selamat pagi” padamu setiap kali kau bangun tidur..
Ku tak bisa menjanjikan apa-apa, ku hanya bisa berjanji kalau gw akan mencintaimu selamanya, ku akan selalu setia padamu, tak akan pernah gw meninggalkanmu, di manapun ku berada, ketahuilah, hati dan pikiranku selalu ada padamu.
Don't let me wait too long again, let us be happy together, let me take care of you, all my life, i mean it...
Don't care about what people say, let them have their opinion, but we alone live our lives.
You know, bahwa cinta kita itu tulus, jangan hanya karena 1 kata bosen menghancurkan semuanya....
Kata orang, cinta sejati tak akan lekang oleh waktu, hanya waktulah yang dapat menjawab. Jangan takut, ada gw di samping lu, kalau nantinya ada masalah di hubungan kita, gw yakin kita akan bisa menjalaninya dengan baik.
Jika kau berpikir mau dibawa ke mana hubungan ini lagi nantinya, jangan dipikirkan, biarlah waktu yang menjawab, kita baru bersama selama 7 bulan, dan selama ini bukankah kita bahagia? Jangan membiarkan masalah-masalah kecil menghancurkannya. Biarlah ku menjadi pria yang membuatmu tertawa dan tersenyum setiap hari.
Mengenai kekhawatiran akan masa depan, semua orang punya kekhawatirannya sendiri, tapi gw berjanji, apapun masalahnya, gw akan selalu ada untukmu, kita berdua akan mencari solusinya bersama-sama.
So, what do you say? take your time to decide, but please, baby, don’t let me wait too long, because i miss you already.
There is never a day that passes by without me thinking of you.
I am, still, waiting for you...
From the one who still love you
Minggu setelahnya, kita berjanji untuk bertemu di CL, tapi karena buswaynya bermasalah, kita mengganti tempat bertemu di TA. Hari itu, kau memakai baju “baby milo yang coklat tua itu, dengan jaket bergaris2 coklat putih”. Ya, image dirimu selalu gw simpan, tak peduli apapun yang kau pakai.
Itulah malam pertama kita makan bersama. Sushi Groove, semeja berdua. Gw yang selama ini tak suka wasabi, kau tunjukkan cara makan yang benar, dan sejak saat itu, ku jadi menyukai wasabi. Saat itu, kubertanya, gimana caranya biar gw bisa memeluk dan mencium mu lagi, dan kau menyarankan untuk ke tempat mu saja.
Hari pertama gw ke tempat mu, sangat canggung sekali, untuk bertemu dengan bokap dan nyokap lu, rasanya gw canggung sekali, tapi dirimu selalu ada untuk ku.. Dan sejak saat itu, kita selalu menghabiskan weekend berdua, selama 2 hari 2 malam. Jumat malam, Sabtu pagi dan malam, dan minggu pagi.
Tahukah dirimu, setiap kali akan berpisah dengan dirimu, pelukan dan ciuman darimu tak pernah cukup kurasa? Begitu tak ingin ku meninggalkanmu, makanya gw bersikeras untuk bertahan sampai malam. Tak tega ku memintamu untuk mengantar gw pulang, karena tempat tinggal kita yang berjauhan. I love you too much to see you get hurt.
(lagi2, air mataku harus menetes ketika menuliskan bagian ini)
You know me, right? Gw sangat sayang dan protektif *tapi bukan posesif* ke orang yang gw sayang. Mana mungkin gw tega memintamu mengantar kan dirimu, setelah itu pulang sendiri lagi di malam hari? Mana mungkin ku tega kau kedinginan oleh karena angin malam >.<
Ku terlalu mencintaimu untuk memintamu melakukan hal itu...
Itulah alasannya kenapa gw kadang suka marah dan kesel sendiri kalau lu lagi keluar, setelah itu kau tetap mengantar kan teman mu pulang dulu, baru lah kau sendiri pulang. Tak tega ku melihatmu jika kau sakit, tapi tak pernah kukatakan padamu, karena, kutau, tak mungkin lah aku ada di tengah antara kau dan temanmu.
Hari - hari kita, kita lalui dengan manis dan indah. Kadang di dapur, ketika kau mengambilkan nasi, kupeluk dirimu dari belakang. Pada saat ku mencuci piring, kau membalas memeluk ku dari belakang...
Masih ingatkah dirimu bagaimana kita makan takoyaki? Kerupuk atau bahkan 1 oreo dimakan berdua?
Haha, iya, saling nyuapin :)Kenangan-kenangan itu akan selalu kusimpan di dalam hatiku
Maafkan diriku ketika sedang bersamamu di luar, maafkan diriku yang tak mungkin bisa mempertontonkan rasa sayangku padamu di depan umum. Maafkan diriku yang tak pernah punya keberanian itu. Kini, kusadar begitu banyak kesalahan yang kulakukan...
Ku masih ingat, saat kutanya dirimu..
G: “Sayang gw gak?”
U: “Ya iyalah, dodol ah”
Di kesempatan lain
G: “lu sayang gw gak?”
U: “banget”
Di kesempatan lain lagi
G: “ i love you, honey”
U: “i love you, too”
Di kesempatan yang lain lagi
G: “Lu cinta sama gw gak?”
U: “Enggak”
G: “Lho? Jadi gitu? Selingkuh neh?”
U: “ Tega? Oh mau? Ya uda, sana sanaa”
G: “Gw gak bilang gw mau”
U: “Terus ngapain nanya?”
G: “jadi cinta gak?”
U: “iya, sayang”
G: “emank bedanya cinta sama sayang itu apa?
U: “ Cinta itu gampang dilupakan, sayang itu susah”
Tahukah dirimu, betapa kau membuatku menjadi pria yang paling bahagia di saat itu, bisa mendengarkan kalimat seperti itu dari dirimu, yang sifat dasarnya adalah cuek. Saat itu, ku tahu bahwa kau benar-benar sayang padaku, dan saat itu juga, sudah kuputuskan, ku akan mencintaimu selamanya...
Tahukah dirimu, ketika dirimu batuk selama beberapa bulan, mendengar dirimu dikerok, betapa sakit nya hatiku, ku menangis di hati (kubayangkan betapa sakitnya itu), tahukah dirimu ketika kau mengatakan bahwa semua sendi-sendimu itu sakit, ku menelepon nyokap gw untuk tau obatnya?
Tahukah dirimu, ku sangat mencintaimu...mungkin lebih dari apapun di dunia ini...
Hon, let’s try again, give us another chance, take my hand, fall in love with me again...
Izinkahlah diriku memeluk mesra dirimu setiap malam kita bersama, izinkanlah diriku memperhatikan dirimu saat kau tidur, dan izinkanlah diriku membisikkan “I love you, dan selamat pagi” padamu setiap kali kau bangun tidur..
Ku tak bisa menjanjikan apa-apa, ku hanya bisa berjanji kalau gw akan mencintaimu selamanya, ku akan selalu setia padamu, tak akan pernah gw meninggalkanmu, di manapun ku berada, ketahuilah, hati dan pikiranku selalu ada padamu.
Don't let me wait too long again, let us be happy together, let me take care of you, all my life, i mean it...
Don't care about what people say, let them have their opinion, but we alone live our lives.
You know, bahwa cinta kita itu tulus, jangan hanya karena 1 kata bosen menghancurkan semuanya....
Kata orang, cinta sejati tak akan lekang oleh waktu, hanya waktulah yang dapat menjawab. Jangan takut, ada gw di samping lu, kalau nantinya ada masalah di hubungan kita, gw yakin kita akan bisa menjalaninya dengan baik.
Jika kau berpikir mau dibawa ke mana hubungan ini lagi nantinya, jangan dipikirkan, biarlah waktu yang menjawab, kita baru bersama selama 7 bulan, dan selama ini bukankah kita bahagia? Jangan membiarkan masalah-masalah kecil menghancurkannya. Biarlah ku menjadi pria yang membuatmu tertawa dan tersenyum setiap hari.
Mengenai kekhawatiran akan masa depan, semua orang punya kekhawatirannya sendiri, tapi gw berjanji, apapun masalahnya, gw akan selalu ada untukmu, kita berdua akan mencari solusinya bersama-sama.
So, what do you say? take your time to decide, but please, baby, don’t let me wait too long, because i miss you already.
There is never a day that passes by without me thinking of you.
I am, still, waiting for you...
From the one who still love you
Our Story - Part III - The Next Days
Part 3 - The next days
28 Maret 2010
Sabtu pagi, kau pulang, ku lihat, baju mu begitu keringatan, maaf, membuat dirimu kepanasan...
Malamnya kau ingin datang, tapi karena hujan, kau tak jadi datang. Tapi akhirnya datang juga di jam 11 malam. Kau datang lagi, hanya untuk melihatku, masih dengan baju putih dan topi putihmu. Tahukan dirimu, betapa sempurnanya kau di mataku?
Ya, saat itu, ku sudah harus pindah, karena harus pindah ke dekat tempat kerja, yang menjadi dilema bagi diriku. Di satu sisi, ku takut kita tak bisa bertemu seperti biasa lagi, tapi kutak mungkin menghabiskan waktu 4 jam di jalan hanya untuk pergi dan pulang dari kantor.
(Sayangku, air mataku menetes lagi saat kutulis kisah ini, ku benar-benar merindumu, tapi apa yang bisa kulakukan, tak mungkin kukatakan padamu, kalau ku rindu padamu, tapi dirimu hanya diam tak bergeming, tak mungkin sanggup kukatakan itu dan menerima kenyataan pahit ini. Maka kuputuskan untuk menuliskan semua perasaan ku di sini, dan berharap, dan kutau, suatu hari nanti, ketika kau memutuskan untuk melihat apa yang kutulis di belakang tiket Hachiko itu, kau akan tahu semua perasaan gw yang gw pendam, semua rasa cinta dan kekecewaan yang pernah kurasakan...)
29 Maret 2010
Minggu. Hari ini, hari gw memindahkan semua barang gw ke tempat tinggal yang baru. Gw masih ingat, saat itu katanya di tempat lu hujan deras. Saat itu, gw blm tau lu tinggal di mana. Gw lagi makan sama paman gw di pluit sakti, yang ternyata sangat dekat dengan tempat lu tinggal. Wajar saja , di tempat mu juga hujan sangat deras.
Do you know? gw segitu cengengnya, sampai gw ada telp ke nyokap gw, gw blg :"kerjaan ini uda mengambil banyak hal dari gw, kebebasan, sekarang bahkan teman2 gw yang di binus mesti gw tinggalkan"
ya, itu memang benar, tapi alasan sebenarnya adalah, ku takut kalau tak bisa bertemu denganmu lagi, tapi kurasa dia tak perlu tahu itu
30 Maret 2010
Senin. Hari ini, tempat ku sudah kosong semuanya, harusnya gw uda pindah ke tempat baru, tapi karena ku masih ingin bertemu denganmu, ku bersikeras untuk tinggal sehari lagi di tempatku yang lama. Ku ingin melihatmu sekali lagi sebelum 1 minggu kita akan berpisah. Karena sejujurnya, pada saat itu, ku tak tahu bagaimana lagi akan bisa bertemu dengan mu, dan menjalani malam yang normal sebagaimana seorang pacar dengan mu. Karena ku tahu, kita tak mungkin bisa melakukan hal -hal tertentu di umum...
Malamnya, kau datang lagi, masih dengan baju putih dan topi putih. Yang ada di pikiranku saat itu hanyalah, betapa ku beruntung bisa mendapatkan cintamu.
Thank you for coming, hon....
28 Maret 2010
Sabtu pagi, kau pulang, ku lihat, baju mu begitu keringatan, maaf, membuat dirimu kepanasan...
Malamnya kau ingin datang, tapi karena hujan, kau tak jadi datang. Tapi akhirnya datang juga di jam 11 malam. Kau datang lagi, hanya untuk melihatku, masih dengan baju putih dan topi putihmu. Tahukan dirimu, betapa sempurnanya kau di mataku?
Ya, saat itu, ku sudah harus pindah, karena harus pindah ke dekat tempat kerja, yang menjadi dilema bagi diriku. Di satu sisi, ku takut kita tak bisa bertemu seperti biasa lagi, tapi kutak mungkin menghabiskan waktu 4 jam di jalan hanya untuk pergi dan pulang dari kantor.
(Sayangku, air mataku menetes lagi saat kutulis kisah ini, ku benar-benar merindumu, tapi apa yang bisa kulakukan, tak mungkin kukatakan padamu, kalau ku rindu padamu, tapi dirimu hanya diam tak bergeming, tak mungkin sanggup kukatakan itu dan menerima kenyataan pahit ini. Maka kuputuskan untuk menuliskan semua perasaan ku di sini, dan berharap, dan kutau, suatu hari nanti, ketika kau memutuskan untuk melihat apa yang kutulis di belakang tiket Hachiko itu, kau akan tahu semua perasaan gw yang gw pendam, semua rasa cinta dan kekecewaan yang pernah kurasakan...)
29 Maret 2010
Minggu. Hari ini, hari gw memindahkan semua barang gw ke tempat tinggal yang baru. Gw masih ingat, saat itu katanya di tempat lu hujan deras. Saat itu, gw blm tau lu tinggal di mana. Gw lagi makan sama paman gw di pluit sakti, yang ternyata sangat dekat dengan tempat lu tinggal. Wajar saja , di tempat mu juga hujan sangat deras.
Do you know? gw segitu cengengnya, sampai gw ada telp ke nyokap gw, gw blg :"kerjaan ini uda mengambil banyak hal dari gw, kebebasan, sekarang bahkan teman2 gw yang di binus mesti gw tinggalkan"
ya, itu memang benar, tapi alasan sebenarnya adalah, ku takut kalau tak bisa bertemu denganmu lagi, tapi kurasa dia tak perlu tahu itu
30 Maret 2010
Senin. Hari ini, tempat ku sudah kosong semuanya, harusnya gw uda pindah ke tempat baru, tapi karena ku masih ingin bertemu denganmu, ku bersikeras untuk tinggal sehari lagi di tempatku yang lama. Ku ingin melihatmu sekali lagi sebelum 1 minggu kita akan berpisah. Karena sejujurnya, pada saat itu, ku tak tahu bagaimana lagi akan bisa bertemu dengan mu, dan menjalani malam yang normal sebagaimana seorang pacar dengan mu. Karena ku tahu, kita tak mungkin bisa melakukan hal -hal tertentu di umum...
Malamnya, kau datang lagi, masih dengan baju putih dan topi putih. Yang ada di pikiranku saat itu hanyalah, betapa ku beruntung bisa mendapatkan cintamu.
Thank you for coming, hon....
Our Story - Part II - First Date
Part 2 - First Date - Hachiko
Kencan pertama, kita merencanakan akan menonton Hachiko di PI di jumat malam, hari pertama kita akan bertemu setelah 1 tahun lebih kenal.
Gw masih ingat status ym lu, 2 status ym lu yang selalu kuingat di hati, “I’m yours :D “ dan “ Duduk manis di sini menanti dirimu” status yg terakhir itu kau taruh pada saat hari jumat sore, hari di mana kita janji akan bertemu.
Gw masih ingat, minggu minggu pertama di saat kata suka sudah terucap, gw selalu senyum-senyum sendiri, dan lu sendiri juga ngaku kalau elu ngalamin hal yang sama, lu pernah bilang kalau nyokap bilang lu senyum-senyum sendiri kaya orang gila.. Hehe
Gw selalu menanti sms dan ym mu.
• Ingatkah gw pernah bilang jgn ym gw di kantor sebelum gw yang ym duluan hanya karena takut ada teman kantor yang melihat.
• Ingatkah dirimu kalau gak peduli di manapun, di busway, di kantor, selalu ada sms dari diriku yang membuat dirimu tersenyum, dan selalu ada sms dari dirimu yang membuat diriku tersenyum
(Susah juga nulis semua kenangan manis ini dengan rasa sakit hati, tapi akan kulanjutkan..)
Malam kencan pertama yang sudah lama kita tunggu akhirnya sampai juga. Maaf, karena salah memberi arah, kau malah menunggu di tempat yang terlewat sedikit. Maaf juga karena diriku telat bentar, ku tau kau tak suka menunggu.
Kencan pertama, di PI, nonton Hachiko, selama dalam perjalanan, kita banyak diam, pengen rasanya ku memeluk dirimu, tapi kuurungkan niatku, karena ku ingat kalimat mu “boleh2 saja, asal wajar di depan umum”. Takut ku-memeluk terlalu tak wajar...
Gw yang gak pernah ke PI, karena sering salah jalan, kau tuntun bahu ku dengan lembut saat hendak mencari jalan. Tahukah dirimu, betapa bergetarnya hatiku ketika kau lakukan itu? Mungkin kau tak pernah tahu, karena memang tak pernah kukatakan padamu.
Setelah nonton, kau membeli makanan yang kau suka, old chang kee. Tapi karena curry puffnya sudah abis, akhirnya kau membeli yang lain, squid kalau gk salah namanya. Kau membeli banyak, tapi ujungnya tak habis juga.
Malam kencan pertama, dilanjutkan di tempat gw. Begitu masuk ke dalam, kita berdua sangat canggung. Begitu hening, kasian dirimu yang kepanasan, tapi kau tahan juga.
(harus berhenti sebentar...hatiku ingin kau tahu, di saat ku menulis kisah ini, ku masih mencintaimu)
Akhirnya ku memulai percakapan, tidak lewat kata-kata, tapi lewat sms, kutunjukkan sms mu yang isinya “i want to hug you and kiss you”, gw blg “so?”
Kaw masih dengan senyum mu yang manis, dan masih canggung, meraih bahu gw, lalu kau cium dan kau peluk. Yes honey, that was my first kiss, and our first kiss. Sisanya, cukup kita berdua saja yang tahu...
Kencan pertama, kita merencanakan akan menonton Hachiko di PI di jumat malam, hari pertama kita akan bertemu setelah 1 tahun lebih kenal.
Gw masih ingat status ym lu, 2 status ym lu yang selalu kuingat di hati, “I’m yours :D “ dan “ Duduk manis di sini menanti dirimu” status yg terakhir itu kau taruh pada saat hari jumat sore, hari di mana kita janji akan bertemu.
Gw masih ingat, minggu minggu pertama di saat kata suka sudah terucap, gw selalu senyum-senyum sendiri, dan lu sendiri juga ngaku kalau elu ngalamin hal yang sama, lu pernah bilang kalau nyokap bilang lu senyum-senyum sendiri kaya orang gila.. Hehe
Gw selalu menanti sms dan ym mu.
• Ingatkah gw pernah bilang jgn ym gw di kantor sebelum gw yang ym duluan hanya karena takut ada teman kantor yang melihat.
• Ingatkah dirimu kalau gak peduli di manapun, di busway, di kantor, selalu ada sms dari diriku yang membuat dirimu tersenyum, dan selalu ada sms dari dirimu yang membuat diriku tersenyum
(Susah juga nulis semua kenangan manis ini dengan rasa sakit hati, tapi akan kulanjutkan..)
Malam kencan pertama yang sudah lama kita tunggu akhirnya sampai juga. Maaf, karena salah memberi arah, kau malah menunggu di tempat yang terlewat sedikit. Maaf juga karena diriku telat bentar, ku tau kau tak suka menunggu.
Kencan pertama, di PI, nonton Hachiko, selama dalam perjalanan, kita banyak diam, pengen rasanya ku memeluk dirimu, tapi kuurungkan niatku, karena ku ingat kalimat mu “boleh2 saja, asal wajar di depan umum”. Takut ku-memeluk terlalu tak wajar...
Gw yang gak pernah ke PI, karena sering salah jalan, kau tuntun bahu ku dengan lembut saat hendak mencari jalan. Tahukah dirimu, betapa bergetarnya hatiku ketika kau lakukan itu? Mungkin kau tak pernah tahu, karena memang tak pernah kukatakan padamu.
Setelah nonton, kau membeli makanan yang kau suka, old chang kee. Tapi karena curry puffnya sudah abis, akhirnya kau membeli yang lain, squid kalau gk salah namanya. Kau membeli banyak, tapi ujungnya tak habis juga.
Malam kencan pertama, dilanjutkan di tempat gw. Begitu masuk ke dalam, kita berdua sangat canggung. Begitu hening, kasian dirimu yang kepanasan, tapi kau tahan juga.
(harus berhenti sebentar...hatiku ingin kau tahu, di saat ku menulis kisah ini, ku masih mencintaimu)
Akhirnya ku memulai percakapan, tidak lewat kata-kata, tapi lewat sms, kutunjukkan sms mu yang isinya “i want to hug you and kiss you”, gw blg “so?”
Kaw masih dengan senyum mu yang manis, dan masih canggung, meraih bahu gw, lalu kau cium dan kau peluk. Yes honey, that was my first kiss, and our first kiss. Sisanya, cukup kita berdua saja yang tahu...
Our Story - Part I - The Beginnning
26 November 2010
Memori indah yang pernah kita punya bersama, yang kini berubah menyakitkan
Memori indah yang kutau harus kubuang suatu saat nanti.
Memori tanda cinta dan kesetiaan dari dua anak manusia
Yang pernah saling mencinta dan saling berjanji setia
The Beginning - The Story of how we met
Part 1 - Love is in the Air
(Nama sudah disamarkan, tempat dan waktu adalah benar)
Ku masih ingat, saat pertama kita saling jatuh cinta. Semuanya berawal dari dirimu yang berkata “say”, dan kubalas dengan “jangan gunakan kata itu padaku kalau memang tak niat, karena ku juga sedang merasakan hal yang sama padamu”.Haha, sudah sifat dan sikap gw itu, sok cool, padahal kadang bisa menjadi sangat sotoy dan plin plan.
Tapi, kau seakan tak peduli, selalu kau gunakan kata itu, you make me fall for u, diawali dengan rasa suka menjadi cinta. Ingatkah dirimu kapan kata suka terucap? :)
G : “lagi online di game?”
U: “iya, kenapa?
G: “oh, bisa online ym bntr? Ada yang mau gw blg?”
U: “iya, bentar ya”
G: (gw yang gk bisa nunggu akhirnya login ke game itu, gw whisp ke lu, gw blg) “I think, i like you” (lagi-lagi gw dengan sok coolnya, gw blg) “suka duank sih, hehe”
U: “i like you, too”
G: “gw online cm mau bilang itu sih, gw off dulu yah”
Gw log off dari game, dan saat itu, kita lanjutkan percakapan di ym, dengan gaya yang masih saja sok, gw masih bermain tarik ulur, sampai kukira dirimu bete. Saat itu juga, ku memutuskan untuk menelepon dirimu untuk pertama kalinya.
Beberapa kali kutelepon, tak ada yang angkat, sampai diriku panik sendiri. Pikirku “apa yang uda gw lakuin, kenapa gw malah bikin org yang gw suka ngambek sama gw, kenapa gw harus sok-sokan cm suka, jelas2 cinta”
Akhirnya setelah beberapa kali mencoba lagi, dirimu menjawab dari seberang sana, yang ternyata ketiduran. Haha, tak pernah kau tahu, betapa leganya hatiku.
Pertama kali mendengar suaramu, yang terpikir di hatiku adalah, ini anak suaranya manja juga. Yang di mana, suara inilah yang setiap hari menemani gw telepon, berbagi kisah, suka dan kesedihan selama 7 bulan ke depannya...
Di percakapan pertama kita, kau bertanya, mau dipanggil apa? Gw bilang terserah, kaw bilang sayang terlalu lazim, akhirnya kita memutuskan untuk menggunakan kata “Honey”. Malamnya, ku tak bisa tidur...karena dirimu memenuhi pikiranku
Ku sms dirimu: “gak bisa tidur neh, gara2 lu, tanggung jawab gih”
Sms balasan: “ya, gmn caranya?”
Akhirnya tertidur juga...kalau gk salah pas jam 2 pagi, besoknya uda mesti kerja lagi, hehe
Paginya, tak seperti biasanya, kau bangun pagi, saat gw masih naik bus 91 sampai ke CL, ku sms dan kau balas. Kalau tidak salah, ada kerjaan untuk menjadi LO di GI yang mengharuskan lu bangun pagi. Yang kau bilang akan didandan menjadi “makhluk biru”, taukah dirimu kenapa tak pernah sekalipun ku meminta untuk melihat foto itu? Bukan karena ku tak mau, tapi karena kau sendiri bilang kalau kau gk suka akan tampang lu saat itu, makanya ku tak pernah meminta.
Memori indah yang pernah kita punya bersama, yang kini berubah menyakitkan
Memori indah yang kutau harus kubuang suatu saat nanti.
Memori tanda cinta dan kesetiaan dari dua anak manusia
Yang pernah saling mencinta dan saling berjanji setia
The Beginning - The Story of how we met
Part 1 - Love is in the Air
(Nama sudah disamarkan, tempat dan waktu adalah benar)
Ku masih ingat, saat pertama kita saling jatuh cinta. Semuanya berawal dari dirimu yang berkata “say”, dan kubalas dengan “jangan gunakan kata itu padaku kalau memang tak niat, karena ku juga sedang merasakan hal yang sama padamu”.Haha, sudah sifat dan sikap gw itu, sok cool, padahal kadang bisa menjadi sangat sotoy dan plin plan.
Tapi, kau seakan tak peduli, selalu kau gunakan kata itu, you make me fall for u, diawali dengan rasa suka menjadi cinta. Ingatkah dirimu kapan kata suka terucap? :)
G : “lagi online di game?”
U: “iya, kenapa?
G: “oh, bisa online ym bntr? Ada yang mau gw blg?”
U: “iya, bentar ya”
G: (gw yang gk bisa nunggu akhirnya login ke game itu, gw whisp ke lu, gw blg) “I think, i like you” (lagi-lagi gw dengan sok coolnya, gw blg) “suka duank sih, hehe”
U: “i like you, too”
G: “gw online cm mau bilang itu sih, gw off dulu yah”
Gw log off dari game, dan saat itu, kita lanjutkan percakapan di ym, dengan gaya yang masih saja sok, gw masih bermain tarik ulur, sampai kukira dirimu bete. Saat itu juga, ku memutuskan untuk menelepon dirimu untuk pertama kalinya.
Beberapa kali kutelepon, tak ada yang angkat, sampai diriku panik sendiri. Pikirku “apa yang uda gw lakuin, kenapa gw malah bikin org yang gw suka ngambek sama gw, kenapa gw harus sok-sokan cm suka, jelas2 cinta”
Akhirnya setelah beberapa kali mencoba lagi, dirimu menjawab dari seberang sana, yang ternyata ketiduran. Haha, tak pernah kau tahu, betapa leganya hatiku.
Pertama kali mendengar suaramu, yang terpikir di hatiku adalah, ini anak suaranya manja juga. Yang di mana, suara inilah yang setiap hari menemani gw telepon, berbagi kisah, suka dan kesedihan selama 7 bulan ke depannya...
Di percakapan pertama kita, kau bertanya, mau dipanggil apa? Gw bilang terserah, kaw bilang sayang terlalu lazim, akhirnya kita memutuskan untuk menggunakan kata “Honey”. Malamnya, ku tak bisa tidur...karena dirimu memenuhi pikiranku
Ku sms dirimu: “gak bisa tidur neh, gara2 lu, tanggung jawab gih”
Sms balasan: “ya, gmn caranya?”
Akhirnya tertidur juga...kalau gk salah pas jam 2 pagi, besoknya uda mesti kerja lagi, hehe
Paginya, tak seperti biasanya, kau bangun pagi, saat gw masih naik bus 91 sampai ke CL, ku sms dan kau balas. Kalau tidak salah, ada kerjaan untuk menjadi LO di GI yang mengharuskan lu bangun pagi. Yang kau bilang akan didandan menjadi “makhluk biru”, taukah dirimu kenapa tak pernah sekalipun ku meminta untuk melihat foto itu? Bukan karena ku tak mau, tapi karena kau sendiri bilang kalau kau gk suka akan tampang lu saat itu, makanya ku tak pernah meminta.
Puisi dariku untukmu
Cinta kita pernah ada
Cintaku padamu tulus dan murni
Kesetiaanku padamu tak bercela
Cinta dan kesetiaanku boleh kau uji
Tapi tampaknya kau berkehendak lain
Cinta kita rela kau lepas
Untuk mencari cinta yang lain
Tapi tak mengapa, sayang...
Janjiku padamu sudah kutepati
Ku pernah berjanji untuk setia sampai akhir
Ku pernah berjanji tak akan meninggalkanmu
Ku pernah berjanji untuk mencintaimu setiap pagi, setiap hari, setiap waktu
Ketahuilah sayang, ku yakin tak ada yang bisa menyaingi rasa sayangku padamu
Jika cinta dan kesetiaan yang kau cari, ada padaku
Satu lagu lagi kupersembahkan untukmu
Sebagai wujud perasaan, cinta, kesetiaanku yang tak akan pernah habis
Permintaan ku padamu, dengarkanlah dan hayatilah lagu ini
Listen to every lyric, it is what my heart wants to say
Malaikat pun tahu
-Dewi Lestari-
Cintaku padamu tulus dan murni
Kesetiaanku padamu tak bercela
Cinta dan kesetiaanku boleh kau uji
Tapi tampaknya kau berkehendak lain
Cinta kita rela kau lepas
Untuk mencari cinta yang lain
Tapi tak mengapa, sayang...
Janjiku padamu sudah kutepati
Ku pernah berjanji untuk setia sampai akhir
Ku pernah berjanji tak akan meninggalkanmu
Ku pernah berjanji untuk mencintaimu setiap pagi, setiap hari, setiap waktu
Ketahuilah sayang, ku yakin tak ada yang bisa menyaingi rasa sayangku padamu
Jika cinta dan kesetiaan yang kau cari, ada padaku
Satu lagu lagi kupersembahkan untukmu
Sebagai wujud perasaan, cinta, kesetiaanku yang tak akan pernah habis
Permintaan ku padamu, dengarkanlah dan hayatilah lagu ini
Listen to every lyric, it is what my heart wants to say
Malaikat pun tahu
-Dewi Lestari-
Rabu, 24 November 2010
Then you look at me
25 Nov 2010
I heard another sad news today.. another friend's dad died due to illness
Condolences to her and her family...
I remembered a song
"Then you look at me - Celine Dion"
Laugh and cry, live and die
Life is a dream we are dreaming..
People run from sun to sun
Caught in a life ever flowing
Day by day, i find my way...
Look for the song and the meaning....
Then you look at me, and i always see
what i have been searching for...
as lost as can be, then you look at me
and i am not lost anymore....
Hm...i somehow think that, separation is inevitable, no matter what the cause is
I never regret telling the ones i love that i love them
If i may, i will tell them everyday...
Sigh, i am remembering some feelings which i shouldn't
I remember my love for you again...
And no, i have no regret telling you "i love you"
if i have the chance, i want to be able to tell you that every day
i want to whisper those words to you every morning you wake up
My saddest thing that i regret the most is:
when you tell me that you are bored
when you tell me that you don't love me anymore
I somehow know that i can mend it, if i were there in Jakarta
but i am not...which breaks my heart a lot..
You know how hurt i felt? I know i can mend it, but i can't
that feeling really sucks, you know that...
I heard another sad news today.. another friend's dad died due to illness
Condolences to her and her family...
I remembered a song
"Then you look at me - Celine Dion"
Laugh and cry, live and die
Life is a dream we are dreaming..
People run from sun to sun
Caught in a life ever flowing
Day by day, i find my way...
Look for the song and the meaning....
Then you look at me, and i always see
what i have been searching for...
as lost as can be, then you look at me
and i am not lost anymore....
Hm...i somehow think that, separation is inevitable, no matter what the cause is
I never regret telling the ones i love that i love them
If i may, i will tell them everyday...
Sigh, i am remembering some feelings which i shouldn't
I remember my love for you again...
And no, i have no regret telling you "i love you"
if i have the chance, i want to be able to tell you that every day
i want to whisper those words to you every morning you wake up
My saddest thing that i regret the most is:
when you tell me that you are bored
when you tell me that you don't love me anymore
I somehow know that i can mend it, if i were there in Jakarta
but i am not...which breaks my heart a lot..
You know how hurt i felt? I know i can mend it, but i can't
that feeling really sucks, you know that...
Stressful worklife
Dear diary,
No other place to turn to, i can only turn to you
I used to have someone to talk to about these stuffs
Back then, no matter how painful and stressful the work can be
I can always turn to that someone..
I just know that, every time i go back home...
You will always wait for me, with your laugh and smile
Now, don't get me wrong, i am not trying to use these words to get you back
It is just that i need to write these feelings somewhere, you know that right
That is why i don't label this post "for you", i use "my life" as the label
Anyway, i got into some trouble and it is painful and stressful enough that i want to cry, but i can't. Either it is because the tear won't come out or because I am too proud to cry and discuss this feeling with my colleagues. I don't know that this work can cause me such a great pain. If i knew, i wouldn't have accepted it.
Dear diary,
Now i know, i can't always depend on you
I must be able to stand up by myself
I keep telling myself "don't worry, you will be alright"
But it seems that "alright" is not here yet, it is still far from sight...
This past month i have been so hurt and painful
I don't deny that the breakup actually took a big toll on my life
I sometimes wonder, why do i have to fall in love with you if it will only end like this..It is too painful, I still love you very much at the time i broke up with you.
And probably still do...
No, i have to forget you. You are not mine anymore. As much as i love the words "i'm yours" you wrote on your YM status long time ago. I know it already ends. It hurts, but yes, i have to move on...I really do...
I am sorry i have to ym you again tonight, please know this that, actually i intended not to ym lu anymore..but it is just that suddenly this work pose such a major problem that i don't know who to turn to.. I thank you from the depth of my heart for listening...
All will be well...
One day..for sure..I believe
No other place to turn to, i can only turn to you
I used to have someone to talk to about these stuffs
Back then, no matter how painful and stressful the work can be
I can always turn to that someone..
I just know that, every time i go back home...
You will always wait for me, with your laugh and smile
Now, don't get me wrong, i am not trying to use these words to get you back
It is just that i need to write these feelings somewhere, you know that right
That is why i don't label this post "for you", i use "my life" as the label
Anyway, i got into some trouble and it is painful and stressful enough that i want to cry, but i can't. Either it is because the tear won't come out or because I am too proud to cry and discuss this feeling with my colleagues. I don't know that this work can cause me such a great pain. If i knew, i wouldn't have accepted it.
Dear diary,
Now i know, i can't always depend on you
I must be able to stand up by myself
I keep telling myself "don't worry, you will be alright"
But it seems that "alright" is not here yet, it is still far from sight...
This past month i have been so hurt and painful
I don't deny that the breakup actually took a big toll on my life
I sometimes wonder, why do i have to fall in love with you if it will only end like this..It is too painful, I still love you very much at the time i broke up with you.
And probably still do...
No, i have to forget you. You are not mine anymore. As much as i love the words "i'm yours" you wrote on your YM status long time ago. I know it already ends. It hurts, but yes, i have to move on...I really do...
I am sorry i have to ym you again tonight, please know this that, actually i intended not to ym lu anymore..but it is just that suddenly this work pose such a major problem that i don't know who to turn to.. I thank you from the depth of my heart for listening...
All will be well...
One day..for sure..I believe
Senin, 22 November 2010
Last Phone Call
22 Nov 2010
I just got off the phone with you? do you remember?
I told you that i am not going to go back this week
I have plans for this week actually...
Just in case, i can't do this plan, i just want you to know
Actually i was planning to relive the moments we had back then.
I intended to surprise you and slow dance with you with only candles :)
Do you remember the date 27? It is the same date and day when we made up
If i remember correctly, it was 01.00 am in the morning
That was when my life changed forever... I fell for you...
You made me so happy for the past 7 months
You are my sunshine
I greet my every morning thinking of you, whether you are asleep or awake
I have my lunch, again thinking whether you are awake or still asleep, plus have u eaten or not :D (yes, you are a sleepyhead, keboooooooo... lolz)
I have my dinner thinking of you, have u eaten your dinner, whether you are outside, whether you are safe, are you cold, are u wearing your jacket (remember to always wear your jacket up)
When i am about to sleep, I always think about when you are going to sleep, and whether you still have trouble sleeping, whether you are home yet, or are you playing.
Yes, ud ud, those are all the things i think about everyday ever since i am yours and you are mine...
Now, let me give u a big smile :D
Back then, everywhere i go, everything i do, i know that you will always be there waiting for me at every Saturday
You know that i will always be there for you too, I will never leave you
I know that i can always count on you, since you are my baby
Haha, now..don't get me wrong, it is not that i want to cling on you forever, i know that each of both of us needs to be free..
Hey, remember to read this only if you think about me, other than that, don't read this, i will be embarrassed >.<
Good nite, my love
Love you
Forever and always...
I just got off the phone with you? do you remember?
I told you that i am not going to go back this week
I have plans for this week actually...
Just in case, i can't do this plan, i just want you to know
Actually i was planning to relive the moments we had back then.
I intended to surprise you and slow dance with you with only candles :)
Do you remember the date 27? It is the same date and day when we made up
If i remember correctly, it was 01.00 am in the morning
That was when my life changed forever... I fell for you...
You made me so happy for the past 7 months
You are my sunshine
I greet my every morning thinking of you, whether you are asleep or awake
I have my lunch, again thinking whether you are awake or still asleep, plus have u eaten or not :D (yes, you are a sleepyhead, keboooooooo... lolz)
I have my dinner thinking of you, have u eaten your dinner, whether you are outside, whether you are safe, are you cold, are u wearing your jacket (remember to always wear your jacket up)
When i am about to sleep, I always think about when you are going to sleep, and whether you still have trouble sleeping, whether you are home yet, or are you playing.
Yes, ud ud, those are all the things i think about everyday ever since i am yours and you are mine...
Now, let me give u a big smile :D
Back then, everywhere i go, everything i do, i know that you will always be there waiting for me at every Saturday
You know that i will always be there for you too, I will never leave you
I know that i can always count on you, since you are my baby
Haha, now..don't get me wrong, it is not that i want to cling on you forever, i know that each of both of us needs to be free..
Hey, remember to read this only if you think about me, other than that, don't read this, i will be embarrassed >.<
Good nite, my love
Love you
Forever and always...
Sabtu, 20 November 2010
Smile always
Ud ud :)
I remember, every time i called u that
you will answer "y y y?"
Remember, whenever you are sad, please smile
I really love to see you smile, you know that...
No matter where you are, who you are with, what happens
Smile always... for you and if you are willing to, for me too...
Like the way i used to ask you for...
Smile always, don't let something unimportant ruin a day's mood
And i want you to know, you will always be in my heart...
Do you remember this movie below? Of all the movies we have seen together, this one is the one which you laugh the most....And i have to say, i like this movie too. lolz....
:D
I remember, every time i called u that
you will answer "y y y?"
Remember, whenever you are sad, please smile
I really love to see you smile, you know that...
No matter where you are, who you are with, what happens
Smile always... for you and if you are willing to, for me too...
Like the way i used to ask you for...
Smile always, don't let something unimportant ruin a day's mood
And i want you to know, you will always be in my heart...
Do you remember this movie below? Of all the movies we have seen together, this one is the one which you laugh the most....And i have to say, i like this movie too. lolz....
:D
Monkey and pigeon
Found this story while browsing for the pics for my
A story about a monkey nurtured by a pigeon
I just thought...wow
Probably not a new story, but somehow, don't ever wonder if animals can love other species, how can we as people not. Haha, i am blabbering again, anyway i just thought it is a good story about love, that it exists everywhere around us...
S.H.M.I.L.Y
I doubt this, but if you ever seen the status on my YM "SCHMILY"
It means:
See
How
Much
I
Love
You
I don't invent those words, i got it somewhere, but i thought it just sounds great
You know that if you let it, i will love you forever, through all good or bad
I promise you to never leave your side, to always be there whenever you need me
I am not naive,
I know about reality, i know that you don't love me anymore
I am just a fool for still loving you even knowing that you won't love me back
I just hope that i can keep this feeling, this feeling that we once had
This feeling that gives me once comfort me and make me happy
Ud, you know it will be hard for me to do this if you keep on ignoring my feeling,
I am afraid by the time you miss, it may have fade away...
I just hope that it won't happen
I can only try to keep it as long as i can
If i can't keep it anymore, i am sorry, i have done my best..
Once again, i am sorry, if any of my care and attention annoys you..
Like when i sms / call you
I never intended to annoy you or make you angry...
Even loving you is never enough, how can i annoy you >.<
I did those things because that were the only way i knew to show you how i care
If it bother you too much, sorry, my dear...
PS: I know you like white, that is why, the rose above is white
Kamis, 18 November 2010
Home
You know that i love to sing even with my so-so voice
I just want to let you know that whenever i am apart from you
I always sing this song, in the shower, of course :D
My friends even teased me for having such a bad voice, haha
Home
Another summer day
Has come and gone away
In Paris and Rome
But I wanna go home
Mmmmmmmm
May be surrounded by
A million people I
Still feel all alone
I just wanna go home
Oh, I miss you, you know
And I’ve been keeping all the letters that I wrote to you
Each one a line or two
“I’m fine baby, how are you?”
Well I would send them but I know that it’s just not enough
My words were cold and flat
And you deserve more than that
Another aeroplane
Another sunny place
I’m lucky, I know
But I wanna go home
Mmmm, I’ve got to go home
Let me go home
I’m just too far from where you are
I wanna come home
And I feel just like I’m living someone else’s life
It’s like I just stepped outside
When everything was going right
And I know just why you could not
Come along with me
'Cause this was not your dream
But you always believed in me
Another winter day has come
And gone away
In even Paris and Rome
And I wanna go home
Let me go home
And I’m surrounded by
A million people I
Still feel all alone
Oh, let me go home
Oh, I miss you, you know
Let me go home
I’ve had my run
Baby, I’m done
I gotta go home
Let me go home
It will all be all right
I’ll be home tonight
I’m coming back home
I just want to let you know that whenever i am apart from you
I always sing this song, in the shower, of course :D
My friends even teased me for having such a bad voice, haha
Home
Another summer day
Has come and gone away
In Paris and Rome
But I wanna go home
Mmmmmmmm
May be surrounded by
A million people I
Still feel all alone
I just wanna go home
Oh, I miss you, you know
And I’ve been keeping all the letters that I wrote to you
Each one a line or two
“I’m fine baby, how are you?”
Well I would send them but I know that it’s just not enough
My words were cold and flat
And you deserve more than that
Another aeroplane
Another sunny place
I’m lucky, I know
But I wanna go home
Mmmm, I’ve got to go home
Let me go home
I’m just too far from where you are
I wanna come home
And I feel just like I’m living someone else’s life
It’s like I just stepped outside
When everything was going right
And I know just why you could not
Come along with me
'Cause this was not your dream
But you always believed in me
Another winter day has come
And gone away
In even Paris and Rome
And I wanna go home
Let me go home
And I’m surrounded by
A million people I
Still feel all alone
Oh, let me go home
Oh, I miss you, you know
Let me go home
I’ve had my run
Baby, I’m done
I gotta go home
Let me go home
It will all be all right
I’ll be home tonight
I’m coming back home
Rabu, 17 November 2010
Another day in Banjar
16 November 2010
16 November 2010, this date is kinda historical. Who knows that one year can be this fast? It has been one year since i signed the work contract. That means i have only 2 more years to go...I can do it..
People are complicated, we always seek for a change, be it to be better or worse. One can only hope, but sometimes, during those efforts, we can be out of track, it is good to have friends to remind you always if you are about to do something wrong.
Thank you, Ayu and Liung, never met such a good friend who dare to step up and tell me what i am doing wrongly.
18 November 2011
I suddenly remember my grandma. Here is the story. My grandma was married twice. Once to a husband who abused her, so she got a divorce. My mum is her daughter from her second husband. My mum told me that, after my grandpa died, my granma is so sad, that she couldn’t sleep for a long time, and hence she had a mental disorder. Even with her state, she was very kind and protective of us. She often scolded the nanny for no reason, she even walked a long walk just to deliver the food she bought to her grandchildren.
That is why, i know that people should learn to let go of something and move on, but whenever i think about how people could meet and then separate, it is just awful. Truly, goodbye is the saddest word. Don’t ever say goodbye, for me, goodbye means that it is very unlikely that you will meet again. From now on, i will only say “see you” or “till we meet again”.
Tell the ones you love that you love them everyday, for time waits for nobody. No one knows what the future hold. Cherish every moments you have now, and you will have no regrets...
16 November 2010, this date is kinda historical. Who knows that one year can be this fast? It has been one year since i signed the work contract. That means i have only 2 more years to go...I can do it..
People are complicated, we always seek for a change, be it to be better or worse. One can only hope, but sometimes, during those efforts, we can be out of track, it is good to have friends to remind you always if you are about to do something wrong.
Thank you, Ayu and Liung, never met such a good friend who dare to step up and tell me what i am doing wrongly.
18 November 2011
I suddenly remember my grandma. Here is the story. My grandma was married twice. Once to a husband who abused her, so she got a divorce. My mum is her daughter from her second husband. My mum told me that, after my grandpa died, my granma is so sad, that she couldn’t sleep for a long time, and hence she had a mental disorder. Even with her state, she was very kind and protective of us. She often scolded the nanny for no reason, she even walked a long walk just to deliver the food she bought to her grandchildren.
That is why, i know that people should learn to let go of something and move on, but whenever i think about how people could meet and then separate, it is just awful. Truly, goodbye is the saddest word. Don’t ever say goodbye, for me, goodbye means that it is very unlikely that you will meet again. From now on, i will only say “see you” or “till we meet again”.
Tell the ones you love that you love them everyday, for time waits for nobody. No one knows what the future hold. Cherish every moments you have now, and you will have no regrets...
Chicken soup
17 November 2010
A holiday! But gosh, time passes so fast, it is just like i just woke up in the morning, but now..it is already 5 pm.
Hm..let's see what have i done today. I woke up, do some walking, browsing the internet, going to the mall, bought a pair of new trousers, which is a bit too long, hehe... Ate magnum ice cream for the second time i think for 25 years... haha...Bought a chicken soup book, will read it soon
Hope i got some inspiration on how to behave..
24 November 2010
Finished reading that book, it is a good book, teach me about how to love someone around me, it teaches me about how to appreciate everyone God has given me in my life.
Bumps along the relationship is to be expected. It is just about how you handle it, if you love your partner, tell him/her you love him/her.
I am glad, i always did that to you. At least, i have no regrets, I know that you know how much i love you, right?
Anyway, good book
A holiday! But gosh, time passes so fast, it is just like i just woke up in the morning, but now..it is already 5 pm.
Hm..let's see what have i done today. I woke up, do some walking, browsing the internet, going to the mall, bought a pair of new trousers, which is a bit too long, hehe... Ate magnum ice cream for the second time i think for 25 years... haha...Bought a chicken soup book, will read it soon
Hope i got some inspiration on how to behave..
24 November 2010
Finished reading that book, it is a good book, teach me about how to love someone around me, it teaches me about how to appreciate everyone God has given me in my life.
Bumps along the relationship is to be expected. It is just about how you handle it, if you love your partner, tell him/her you love him/her.
I am glad, i always did that to you. At least, i have no regrets, I know that you know how much i love you, right?
Anyway, good book
Selasa, 16 November 2010
Letter to you (2)
Have been doing some thinking (it is just who i am...)
Now i can see how selfish i am, i always talk about how much i love you, but i have to be honest with you, i have doubts too sometimes, one of them is about my decision to keep on waiting for you. I am somehow afraid if i might get hurt or if this doesn’t work out, then i think i will be wasting time.
But, then i realize, if i do love you, then i should wait, even if it doesn’t work out between us... at least, i have proven that what i said is true, that all those feelings i have for you is real..and i won’t regret it.
It is my own choice after all...
People don’t live forever,
I just want to be happy, and i want to make you happy too
If God permit, i want us to be happy together
Come on now, give me a smile, just like you used to.
Don’t be sad, what done is done...it is for the best...
Listening to a song which pretty much concludes what i want to say to you, hehe, listen to this well, okay?
M2M - The Day You Went Away
Well I wonder could it be
When I was dreaming ’bout you baby
You were dreaming of me
Call me crazy, call me blind
To still be suffering is stupid after all of this time
Did I lose my love to someone better
And does she love you like I do
I do, you know I really really do
Well hey
So much I need to say
Been lonely since the day
The day you went away
So sad but true
For me there’s only you
Been crying since the day
The day you went away
I remember date and time
September twenty second
Sunday twenty five after nine
In the doorway with your case
No longer shouting at each other
There were tears on our faces
And we were letting go of something special
Something we’ll never have again
I know, I guess I really really know
Why do we never know what we’ve got ’til it’s gone
How could I carry on
The day you went away
Cause I’ve been missing you so much I have to say
Been crying since the day
Now i can see how selfish i am, i always talk about how much i love you, but i have to be honest with you, i have doubts too sometimes, one of them is about my decision to keep on waiting for you. I am somehow afraid if i might get hurt or if this doesn’t work out, then i think i will be wasting time.
But, then i realize, if i do love you, then i should wait, even if it doesn’t work out between us... at least, i have proven that what i said is true, that all those feelings i have for you is real..and i won’t regret it.
It is my own choice after all...
People don’t live forever,
I just want to be happy, and i want to make you happy too
If God permit, i want us to be happy together
Come on now, give me a smile, just like you used to.
Don’t be sad, what done is done...it is for the best...
Listening to a song which pretty much concludes what i want to say to you, hehe, listen to this well, okay?
M2M - The Day You Went Away
Well I wonder could it be
When I was dreaming ’bout you baby
You were dreaming of me
Call me crazy, call me blind
To still be suffering is stupid after all of this time
Did I lose my love to someone better
And does she love you like I do
I do, you know I really really do
Well hey
So much I need to say
Been lonely since the day
The day you went away
So sad but true
For me there’s only you
Been crying since the day
The day you went away
I remember date and time
September twenty second
Sunday twenty five after nine
In the doorway with your case
No longer shouting at each other
There were tears on our faces
And we were letting go of something special
Something we’ll never have again
I know, I guess I really really know
Why do we never know what we’ve got ’til it’s gone
How could I carry on
The day you went away
Cause I’ve been missing you so much I have to say
Been crying since the day
Minggu, 14 November 2010
Letter to you (1)
15 November 2010 - 11.50 pm
Got back to Banjar, waiting for the car for about 30 minutes. Stopped by at the tofu shop and then go into office again to work.
It’s already noon in here, i wonder how you are doing there. You never like hot weather and too crowded places. Honestly, i still have mixed feeling. I do still love you, u know that right? That is why, it is still so hard for me to let go. Since morning, i’ve been thinking a lot, about what i should do and what i shouldn’t, but there are nothing that i can decide. I am such a fool now, i know. I want to be able to blame, but i can’t... I’ve been thinking about what i did wrong, so that we ended up like this. Am i not good enough for you? Or is it you are the one who is the fool to let go of me.
Anyway, i know that there is no use for us to know who is right or who is wrong. What is the purpose o f that? I really miss what we had, the way you care for me, the way you love me, I love that all.
Do you know that you are perfect in my eyes, you are everything that i am not.
I find it funny sometimes, how i am unable to recognize streets, but you can....like how i am a planner and you are not.
As always... i just want you to know that...i love you everyday, honey...
Let me keep this feeling safe in my heart.
I do not know how long i can keep this up, but i will try it as long as i can. ..
Got back to Banjar, waiting for the car for about 30 minutes. Stopped by at the tofu shop and then go into office again to work.
It’s already noon in here, i wonder how you are doing there. You never like hot weather and too crowded places. Honestly, i still have mixed feeling. I do still love you, u know that right? That is why, it is still so hard for me to let go. Since morning, i’ve been thinking a lot, about what i should do and what i shouldn’t, but there are nothing that i can decide. I am such a fool now, i know. I want to be able to blame, but i can’t... I’ve been thinking about what i did wrong, so that we ended up like this. Am i not good enough for you? Or is it you are the one who is the fool to let go of me.
Anyway, i know that there is no use for us to know who is right or who is wrong. What is the purpose o f that? I really miss what we had, the way you care for me, the way you love me, I love that all.
Do you know that you are perfect in my eyes, you are everything that i am not.
I find it funny sometimes, how i am unable to recognize streets, but you can....like how i am a planner and you are not.
As always... i just want you to know that...i love you everyday, honey...
Let me keep this feeling safe in my heart.
I do not know how long i can keep this up, but i will try it as long as i can. ..
Kamis, 11 November 2010
Particular Evening
11 November 2010 - 7.30 pm
It is evening now here, still thinking of you..i wonder if you will ever know. Maybe it doesn’t matter to you anymore. Currently listening to all those songs we have listened to together at our first weeks. Those songs are still good to listen, but the feelings that are listening to them now are a bit different.
Don’t get me wrong, i can still afford a smile or two. However, i still can’t let go of all those memories we have ever had together. Honestly, i don’t know what the future hold for the both of us, but then again...i am just a human, with heart, with feelings...don’t blame me for keeping this hope in my heart...
It is evening now here, still thinking of you..i wonder if you will ever know. Maybe it doesn’t matter to you anymore. Currently listening to all those songs we have listened to together at our first weeks. Those songs are still good to listen, but the feelings that are listening to them now are a bit different.
Don’t get me wrong, i can still afford a smile or two. However, i still can’t let go of all those memories we have ever had together. Honestly, i don’t know what the future hold for the both of us, but then again...i am just a human, with heart, with feelings...don’t blame me for keeping this hope in my heart...
Jumat, 05 November 2010
To the one i love...
To the one i love,
(probably when you are reading this, you will need a dictionary and the grammar lessons i gave you, only read this if you think that you miss me, if you are not, don’t continue, just leave....)
When you are reading this, probably i am not by your side anymore...I woke up on 6 November 2010, just thinking about us, about what i want to do with my life, and i know that i can’t stay like this forever...I need to move on with my life, but it is just that i love you so much that i can’t stop. I am afraid i might lose my mind, so i decided that if things can’t work out between us, then i probably have to erase all those memories we have, and erase you from my life completely....
Before i do, i know that i have to write all these memories down, so there will be something to remind me of what we had once....
Honey, I will miss the way you squeeze my hand gently when i put my hand next to your arm when we are together at night. I will miss the way you look at me with your loving eyes whenever i come back to your side from work and you greet me. I will miss the way you smile so stupidly, the way you laugh and the way you react when you are ashamed...(you know when you suddenly fart) :)
I will miss your arms around my waist and my shoulder. I will miss the way you touch my shoulder when we first met and watched a movie together. I will never forget the way we feed each other with cookies or the likes. I miss to see you so happy when you are playing games, and i miss the image of looking at you even from your back when you are playing. I miss the way i hug you at night.
I will never forget how you ask me to move to sleep next to you at night. The way you so ashamedly won’t walk into a store when we were in Tanjung Duren. I love the way you got jealous when i tease you about what i did with my friends (please know that i did that only to see you jealous, because that way i can really feel your love, it never occurs in my mind to love another when i am with you).
I miss the way you call me 'sotoy', i will miss the time when i am waiting happily like a little child waiting for his candy. I really miss the way i call you :’ud ud ud’, and you answer with ‘y y y?’ I will miss the way you sit on my lap, and me touching your hair and face. I will miss the taste of your lips when we kissed (and no, i won’t go any further, you know me....). Most importantly the one thing i will never forget, is the look you gave me when i am going out town for work, as i promise, this image of you, i will forever keep in my heart....
If things doesn’t work out between us, i want you to know, that i will always love you.. There is no one who is right or wrong in a relationship, I believe that if a relationship doesn’t work out, it is both fault. Remember something, when you ask advices from your friend, please know that all they see is the third perspective, they can’t be 100% sure of what you are doing and what you have endured, so, it is always wise to decide things on your own and with your heart. Please remember my advices, don’t ruin your life with games, or anything bad. You know, you are a good person, and you deserve to have a good life.
So i will bid you farewell, you, the first love of my life, please know that, asking me to be your friend while i am still in love with you is cruel and hard. But, i can only try....
There’s also something else you need to know, i want to apologize if i ever make you sad or distract you or probably annoy you. But you have to know, i did all those things because of my love and my care to you, none of my text messages or my calls late at night is for fun only, i really did that because i care about you.
Last but not least...I must tell you something and i will tell you now: “Honey, i will always love you. I will be waiting for you, but please don’t take too long, because i miss you already..."
From the one who love you sincerely...
(probably when you are reading this, you will need a dictionary and the grammar lessons i gave you, only read this if you think that you miss me, if you are not, don’t continue, just leave....)
When you are reading this, probably i am not by your side anymore...I woke up on 6 November 2010, just thinking about us, about what i want to do with my life, and i know that i can’t stay like this forever...I need to move on with my life, but it is just that i love you so much that i can’t stop. I am afraid i might lose my mind, so i decided that if things can’t work out between us, then i probably have to erase all those memories we have, and erase you from my life completely....
Before i do, i know that i have to write all these memories down, so there will be something to remind me of what we had once....
Honey, I will miss the way you squeeze my hand gently when i put my hand next to your arm when we are together at night. I will miss the way you look at me with your loving eyes whenever i come back to your side from work and you greet me. I will miss the way you smile so stupidly, the way you laugh and the way you react when you are ashamed...(you know when you suddenly fart) :)
I will miss your arms around my waist and my shoulder. I will miss the way you touch my shoulder when we first met and watched a movie together. I will never forget the way we feed each other with cookies or the likes. I miss to see you so happy when you are playing games, and i miss the image of looking at you even from your back when you are playing. I miss the way i hug you at night.
I will never forget how you ask me to move to sleep next to you at night. The way you so ashamedly won’t walk into a store when we were in Tanjung Duren. I love the way you got jealous when i tease you about what i did with my friends (please know that i did that only to see you jealous, because that way i can really feel your love, it never occurs in my mind to love another when i am with you).
I miss the way you call me 'sotoy', i will miss the time when i am waiting happily like a little child waiting for his candy. I really miss the way i call you :’ud ud ud’, and you answer with ‘y y y?’ I will miss the way you sit on my lap, and me touching your hair and face. I will miss the taste of your lips when we kissed (and no, i won’t go any further, you know me....). Most importantly the one thing i will never forget, is the look you gave me when i am going out town for work, as i promise, this image of you, i will forever keep in my heart....
If things doesn’t work out between us, i want you to know, that i will always love you.. There is no one who is right or wrong in a relationship, I believe that if a relationship doesn’t work out, it is both fault. Remember something, when you ask advices from your friend, please know that all they see is the third perspective, they can’t be 100% sure of what you are doing and what you have endured, so, it is always wise to decide things on your own and with your heart. Please remember my advices, don’t ruin your life with games, or anything bad. You know, you are a good person, and you deserve to have a good life.
So i will bid you farewell, you, the first love of my life, please know that, asking me to be your friend while i am still in love with you is cruel and hard. But, i can only try....
There’s also something else you need to know, i want to apologize if i ever make you sad or distract you or probably annoy you. But you have to know, i did all those things because of my love and my care to you, none of my text messages or my calls late at night is for fun only, i really did that because i care about you.
Last but not least...I must tell you something and i will tell you now: “Honey, i will always love you. I will be waiting for you, but please don’t take too long, because i miss you already..."
From the one who love you sincerely...
Kamis, 04 November 2010
Guide to a better life
A dear friend gave me this article...
Hope it will be useful to anyone reading this :)
GUIDE To A BETTER LIFE
This is amazing, Randy Pausch 47 years old, and a computer Science lecturer from Mellon University. He died of pancreatic cancer in 2008, but wrote a book “The last lecture” before then, one of the bestsellers in 2007. What a legacy to leave behind…
In a letter to his wife Jai and his children, Dylan, Logan, and Chloe, he wrote this beautiful "guide to a better life" for his wife and children to follow.
May you be blessed by his insight.
Points of How to improve your life
Personality:
1. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
2. Don't have negative thoughts of things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment
3. Don't over do; keep your limits
4. Don't take yourself so seriously; no one else does
5. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip
6. Dream more while you are awake
7. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need
8. Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner of his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
9. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.
10.Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present
11.No one is in charge of your happiness except you
12.Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn.
Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
13.Smile and laugh more
14.You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
Community:
15.Call your family often
16.Each day give something good to others
17.Forgive everyone for everything
18.Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6
19.Try to make at least three people smile each day
20.What other people think of you is none of your business
21.Your job will not take care of you when you are sick. Your family and friends will. Stay in touch.
Life:
22.Put GOD first in anything and everything that you think, say and do.
23.GOD heals everything
24.Do the right things
25.However good or bad a situation is, it will change
26.No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up
27.The best is yet to come
28.Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful
29.When you awake alive in the morning, thank GOD for it
30.If you know GOD, you will always be happy. So, be happy.
While you practice the entire above, share this knowledge with the people you love, people you school with, people you play with, people you work with and people you live with.
Not only will it enrich YOUR life, but also that of those around you.
Remember, Good Things are for us to share..
Hope it will be useful to anyone reading this :)
GUIDE To A BETTER LIFE
This is amazing, Randy Pausch 47 years old, and a computer Science lecturer from Mellon University. He died of pancreatic cancer in 2008, but wrote a book “The last lecture” before then, one of the bestsellers in 2007. What a legacy to leave behind…
In a letter to his wife Jai and his children, Dylan, Logan, and Chloe, he wrote this beautiful "guide to a better life" for his wife and children to follow.
May you be blessed by his insight.
Points of How to improve your life
Personality:
1. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
2. Don't have negative thoughts of things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment
3. Don't over do; keep your limits
4. Don't take yourself so seriously; no one else does
5. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip
6. Dream more while you are awake
7. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need
8. Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner of his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
9. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.
10.Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present
11.No one is in charge of your happiness except you
12.Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn.
Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
13.Smile and laugh more
14.You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
Community:
15.Call your family often
16.Each day give something good to others
17.Forgive everyone for everything
18.Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6
19.Try to make at least three people smile each day
20.What other people think of you is none of your business
21.Your job will not take care of you when you are sick. Your family and friends will. Stay in touch.
Life:
22.Put GOD first in anything and everything that you think, say and do.
23.GOD heals everything
24.Do the right things
25.However good or bad a situation is, it will change
26.No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up
27.The best is yet to come
28.Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful
29.When you awake alive in the morning, thank GOD for it
30.If you know GOD, you will always be happy. So, be happy.
While you practice the entire above, share this knowledge with the people you love, people you school with, people you play with, people you work with and people you live with.
Not only will it enrich YOUR life, but also that of those around you.
Remember, Good Things are for us to share..
Happiness...
Simple quote:
Happiness...
It's something everyone searches for...
Some are sure they'll find it when they move back home
Some think they'll find it by making a new friend
Some hope they'll find it once they defeat the competition
Then, there are those who stopped searching for it
Because they look up one day only to discover...
That it is right in front of them... all of the time...
Happiness...
It's something everyone searches for...
Some are sure they'll find it when they move back home
Some think they'll find it by making a new friend
Some hope they'll find it once they defeat the competition
Then, there are those who stopped searching for it
Because they look up one day only to discover...
That it is right in front of them... all of the time...
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