Did you know?
Things that I did that you don't know:
- setiap kali gw bangun pagi,gw cek status ym lu. Idle atau available. Nih anak masi bangun atau uda tidur ya?
- saat lu kena tilang polisi kmrn, gw rela nunggu 1 jam lebih di dpn rumah dgn semua barang di tangan dan sms lu "gw uda masuk" hanya dengan tujuan agar lu gk buru2 dan ati2 di jalan
- setiap kali lu memilih keluar sama tmn drpd gw. Gw selalu senyum dan blg "ya bagus lah". Tapi sbnrnya gw cm berharap kl gw ada di sana
- waktu lu les kmrn ujan. Gw sms utk tny apa lu keujanan. Tp gk lu balas, dan lu lebih milih utk membalas sms org yg kau suka.
- setiap kali gw keluar sama lu, dan liat lu sms org yg lu suka. Taukah lu betapa sakitnya hati ini? Cm gak pernah kutunjukkan. Gw berpura2 tidak tahu apa2
- pd saat lu keujanan di ancol. Hanya 1 hal yg kupikirkan ”ya Tuhan, jika boleh biarkan saya saja yang basah, jangan dia".
- setiap kali gw meminta lu utk luangin weekend, gw tau itu agak kelewatan, maafkan, krn gw hanya ingin menghabiskan waktu bersamamu aja
- gw suka renang, tp krn lu pernah blg lu gk pede gw gk pernah ajak lu utk pergi. Mgkn gw ada salah di sini krn krg mengerti lu
- saat gw blg pancake lu enak, I really mean it
- setiap kali gw tidur di samping lu, betapa gw berharap bs kek gitu terus,cm gw tetap memilih pindah hanya agar lu tidurnya enak
- gw selalu membantu lu mendownload semua film yang lu suka, hanya agar lu bisa nonton dan senang aja...hanya itu
Please know that there is no one else that I want to be with other than you
Kamis, 17 Maret 2011
Rabu, 16 Maret 2011
If only you know
16 Maret 2011
Lanjutan dari BBM gw ke lu tentang “jika kau tahu apa yang gw rasa selama ini”
Pagi2 ini mellow, gara2 lagu, salahkan si my bloody valentine. Gw gak tau juga yah di lu itu gimana rasanya, tapi gw sendiri merasa kalau gw sekarang bahkan tidak lebih penting daripada teman lu.
Tapi, tahukah kau?
Setiap kali gw berusaha tersenyum ataupun ketawa pada saat membicarakan antara kau dan dia, betapa sakitnya rasa di hati ini? Setiap kali gw kepikiran tentang dirimu, kadang terasa senang dan kadang terasa sedih (this is really not good, because i think about you all the time). Ketika sakit, sangat sakit terasa, ketika senang, sangat senang.
Tapi bagaimana caranya gw harus kasi tau lu tentang perasaan gw ini? Gk mungkin gw memaksa lu untuk mencintai gw lagi, karena cinta itu tak bisa dipaksa.
Jujur, kadang gw kepikiran untuk pergi, tapi masih ada rasa di hati ini yang menahan, sehingga gw selalu mencari alasan untuk bertahan, dan bodohnya itu, gw selalu mendapatkan alasan untuk bertahan.
Gw tau kalau gw gak akan sanggup bertahan begini lagi..But know this, I am serious and I really mean it that I Love you, I love you very much, with all my heart. I care for you a lot. Think of how many people who really care about you? Berapa orang yang bertanya kau sudah makan atau belum? Berapa orang yang mengkhawatirkan dirimu kalau lu lagi di jalan? Berapa orang yang pernah menanyakan gimana kabar lu dan kesehatan lu kalau lu sakit? Berapa orang yang mengucapkan selamat malam dan selamat pagi buat lu?
Tapi gw tau, gw gak akan sanggup tetap berteman dengan lu kalau misalnya memang harus berakhir, karena gw gak sekuat itu. Gw tau kalau memang harus berakhir, semuanya harus berakhir, dan ending.
Everyday i pray to God to give me strength and hope to move on with my life. The only reason I am still here waiting for you is because i love you.
Lanjutan dari BBM gw ke lu tentang “jika kau tahu apa yang gw rasa selama ini”
Pagi2 ini mellow, gara2 lagu, salahkan si my bloody valentine. Gw gak tau juga yah di lu itu gimana rasanya, tapi gw sendiri merasa kalau gw sekarang bahkan tidak lebih penting daripada teman lu.
Tapi, tahukah kau?
Setiap kali gw berusaha tersenyum ataupun ketawa pada saat membicarakan antara kau dan dia, betapa sakitnya rasa di hati ini? Setiap kali gw kepikiran tentang dirimu, kadang terasa senang dan kadang terasa sedih (this is really not good, because i think about you all the time). Ketika sakit, sangat sakit terasa, ketika senang, sangat senang.
Tapi bagaimana caranya gw harus kasi tau lu tentang perasaan gw ini? Gk mungkin gw memaksa lu untuk mencintai gw lagi, karena cinta itu tak bisa dipaksa.
Jujur, kadang gw kepikiran untuk pergi, tapi masih ada rasa di hati ini yang menahan, sehingga gw selalu mencari alasan untuk bertahan, dan bodohnya itu, gw selalu mendapatkan alasan untuk bertahan.
Gw tau kalau gw gak akan sanggup bertahan begini lagi..But know this, I am serious and I really mean it that I Love you, I love you very much, with all my heart. I care for you a lot. Think of how many people who really care about you? Berapa orang yang bertanya kau sudah makan atau belum? Berapa orang yang mengkhawatirkan dirimu kalau lu lagi di jalan? Berapa orang yang pernah menanyakan gimana kabar lu dan kesehatan lu kalau lu sakit? Berapa orang yang mengucapkan selamat malam dan selamat pagi buat lu?
Tapi gw tau, gw gak akan sanggup tetap berteman dengan lu kalau misalnya memang harus berakhir, karena gw gak sekuat itu. Gw tau kalau memang harus berakhir, semuanya harus berakhir, dan ending.
Everyday i pray to God to give me strength and hope to move on with my life. The only reason I am still here waiting for you is because i love you.
Jumat, 04 Maret 2011
Moving - Saturday
5 March 2011, 08.42 am
i woke up early again this morning, as usual
still watching you sleep and touching your hair
i can't help but always want to keep u warm in your blanket
when i asked you last night, that maybe if you can love me again
you said, maybe, do you know that single word has such an effect on me?
you made me love you again, i only hope that things can be good for us
i have many thoughts with me, i love you,i really do
but, i cant ask you to be my love again, not when i know what i will drag you into...
the truth is, i am really confused and i can't even tell you this
i woke up early again this morning, as usual
still watching you sleep and touching your hair
i can't help but always want to keep u warm in your blanket
when i asked you last night, that maybe if you can love me again
you said, maybe, do you know that single word has such an effect on me?
you made me love you again, i only hope that things can be good for us
i have many thoughts with me, i love you,i really do
but, i cant ask you to be my love again, not when i know what i will drag you into...
the truth is, i am really confused and i can't even tell you this
Another Sad Friday Story
4th March 2011, 18.17 pm
Rain in pouring, i am sorry if i ask too much of you
I really want us to have a good memory, at least one...
that is why i ask you to go with me there
I am sorry that it rained, i didnt know that, because in the morning, the weather seems just fine
I really dont know what to do anymore
If you know, i gave up so many things just to be with you
I should have been packing and finding a new lodging house
But, i just want to be with you as long as i can, that is why i postpone those
If you know me well enough, you will know that i will never let a job unfinished
I think it is time
for me to face the undeniable truth
You are not into me anymore
No matter how much i love you, you just never care
You dont even care if i am sick, or havent eaten my lunch or something
BUT believe this when i tell you this
I CARE for you deeply, i am worried if you go out late at night
I am worried whether you are wet or not, whether you have eaten or not...
Somehow it is just too painful for me, and i dont think i can go on...
Should i be gone tomorrow? or should i wait till next week?
While i was helping your mum moved the chairs, she told me that tomorrow morning at 10 a.m, you will be having a 100th day ceremony of your grandma
I dont think i can go, i think i will just go back to where i belong
Make no mistake, I love you, but still, i think it is best if i leave
I just hope that you are happy
Here i am again, watching you sleep...
Till we meet again....
I hope this is the right decision u have made
You choose him over me, you choose to care for him over me
and i cant live like this anymore
because waiting for you is like waiting for a raindrop in the long drought...
Too painful and too tiring
Farewell, my love
You will always have a piece of my heart, but what we have is over.....
Rain in pouring, i am sorry if i ask too much of you
I really want us to have a good memory, at least one...
that is why i ask you to go with me there
I am sorry that it rained, i didnt know that, because in the morning, the weather seems just fine
I really dont know what to do anymore
If you know, i gave up so many things just to be with you
I should have been packing and finding a new lodging house
But, i just want to be with you as long as i can, that is why i postpone those
If you know me well enough, you will know that i will never let a job unfinished
I think it is time
for me to face the undeniable truth
You are not into me anymore
No matter how much i love you, you just never care
You dont even care if i am sick, or havent eaten my lunch or something
BUT believe this when i tell you this
I CARE for you deeply, i am worried if you go out late at night
I am worried whether you are wet or not, whether you have eaten or not...
Somehow it is just too painful for me, and i dont think i can go on...
Should i be gone tomorrow? or should i wait till next week?
While i was helping your mum moved the chairs, she told me that tomorrow morning at 10 a.m, you will be having a 100th day ceremony of your grandma
I dont think i can go, i think i will just go back to where i belong
Make no mistake, I love you, but still, i think it is best if i leave
I just hope that you are happy
Here i am again, watching you sleep...
Till we meet again....
I hope this is the right decision u have made
You choose him over me, you choose to care for him over me
and i cant live like this anymore
because waiting for you is like waiting for a raindrop in the long drought...
Too painful and too tiring
Farewell, my love
You will always have a piece of my heart, but what we have is over.....
Kamis, 03 Maret 2011
Sad Friday
04 March 2011, 09.08 am
Today, this morning
Watching you sleep, typing this blog, i cried
While writing this, teardrops are still falling
I love you, i really do....
It is so sad that i can't tell you
And so sad that you don't love me back
I really love you the way you are,
I am fine and ok with everything you have now
Your smile, your appearance, your style, your attitude, your everything
But, i have a feeling that we can't go on like this
I have a feeling that you are in love with someone else
In which i can't stand
Is this really the time to say goodbye?
I love you and i miss you love me
Today, this morning
Watching you sleep, typing this blog, i cried
While writing this, teardrops are still falling
I love you, i really do....
It is so sad that i can't tell you
And so sad that you don't love me back
I really love you the way you are,
I am fine and ok with everything you have now
Your smile, your appearance, your style, your attitude, your everything
But, i have a feeling that we can't go on like this
I have a feeling that you are in love with someone else
In which i can't stand
Is this really the time to say goodbye?
I love you and i miss you love me
Minggu, 20 Februari 2011
Some good quotes
We may think we’ve left the past behind, but it has a way of catching up to us
Though we want to runaway, we are forced to confront our past
And the secrets that it buried must come into the light
And then if we are strong, we are able to move on
Yes, we all need to leave the past behind, and move on toward the future
And if we are lucky, we will have help getting there
Though we want to runaway, we are forced to confront our past
And the secrets that it buried must come into the light
And then if we are strong, we are able to move on
Yes, we all need to leave the past behind, and move on toward the future
And if we are lucky, we will have help getting there
Minggu, 06 Februari 2011
02.00 am...
Like the title said.
It`s 2 am in the morning here.
I can't sleep, still thinking about us.
I miss ur laugh, ur smile, ur eyes
I miss the way u so reluctantly get up in the morning
I miss everything about us...
Like always,I can't tell u all of these
I can't even tell you that i love you now
Even though all these heartache and everything
My love for you has never been lost...
Yes, i still love you
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